Jesus, take the wheel
Take it from my hands
‘Cause I can’t do this on my own
If you know me in real life, you know I am kind of a control freak. No, that seems a little harsh…but I like to take charge and make sure things get done, sometimes. When it’s important to me. Or when nobody else is taking charge and something needs doing. Does that qualify as a “freak”?
Anyway, I do it with the purest of intentions but this part of my personality tends to seep into most areas of my life. If I’m not being that way, then I’m working hard to contain myself and not let my crazy show. haha My point is, I have noticed this has also been a pattern I’ve seen in my relationship with my Heavenly Father.
He’s the God of the Universe. He obviously knows A LOT more about life (and my life in particular) than I do. He knows what is best for me. He knows how to lead me and guide me and take me where I need to be. I know this! I am well aware. But sometimes I still find myself trying to inform Him of how life is going to happen. As you can imagine, this does not work out very well.
I have had many experiences in my life, where as I pursue a variety of interests or paths that I think are correct, I get the subtle but firm prompt that sounds something along the lines of “Alyssa, you are not in charge. Let go”. Let go. Me. Let go. HA! But I try. I really, honestly do try because I want to be obedient and I really do know He knows best so if he says I need to relinquish control, I should. Most of the time I am able to do well for a time and feel good about it. But then I slip and find myself once again trying to run the show, steer the ship….take control.
Well, folks. I’ve had it. There are things I want to do in life, goals I’ve had, pursuits I’ve wanted to able to see through to fruition and timelines that I was sure were right. Time and time again, I’ve been proven wrong. Once again, I am here to admit – I am not the one in charge! I feel very strongly that I am EXACTLY where I need to be in my life right now. I feel so much peace and calm about that, which is of course wonderful and reassuring. But yet other things don’t quite make sense.
Have you ever tried to figure out God’s plan in advance and you feel like He couldn’t be possibly taking you to the place you need to go because it seems like such a convoluted way of getting there? That’s how I feel right now about life. I expect to feel this way over and over as life progresses. I’m out of my own ideas for how life should play out, I’m done trying to call the shots because few of them seem to work out the way I intended and I feel like I’m staring at a dead end where God apparently sees new opportunities. This has lead to what I like to call having a “Jesus, take the wheel” moment. I am done trying to be in charge. Seriously.
As I’ve done so, as I’ve relinquished my will to His, as I’ve worked hard to truly let go this time, it has been SUCH a relief! I can see things falling into place in my life and those things that haven’t yet, I know are on their way, when the time is right for me. It turns out life is really good when you completely allow God to steer. (Note: Obviously I’m doing my part to keep the Commandments, be a good person, look for ways to progress, put in my side of the effort, etc. This doesn’t mean I get to sit back and do nothing. It means I quit trying to force things and follow the plan He has for me.)
I was chatting with a good friend the other day about some exciting things going on in her life. While it’s all happy stuff, it’s not necessarily happening in the way she would have picked, if she had been the one in charge. Luckily, she’s been wise and has been good about staying close to the Lord and responding to His guidance. As I sat listening to her, I felt a distinct impression of “See? I am taking care of her and her timeline. I’ll take care of you, too”. Is there any greater reassurance than that?
So, friends, I am here to tell you God knows best. I know He does. As a hardheaded woman, I know firsthand how tough it can be to let someone else call the shots, especially when you can’t see the full picture they have in mind. But I can also promise that by trusting the Lord and staying close to the Spirit we can make sure we are exactly where we need to be in life. He’ll take care of us. Because He loves us.
See? Told you last post you’d get some word vomit 😉